The Good Place

by GRACE JEFFERS / 04.28.2015

photography by ANNELISE PHILIPS / stylist by PRISCILLA POLLEY



I would say that I can’t believe I know you

But the truth is

I can

Where I struggle is

Accepting that I am worthy

Of such as gift

That I can live without a struggle

I have spent so long on the other side looking in

It is new territory to think


The dream I did not even know I had

May just have come true

I went to a horse clinic with the horse whisperer Buck Brannaman

Buck said something that I thought was so powerful

He asked the students to back up their horses

Stop them

And then lope them forward

He stopped them all performing this exercise

And explained that

They were making their horses move as if they were running away from something

But maybe they could encourage their horses to lope to

A peaceful place

Every single horse and rider shifted their energy

And loped forward with calm joy

I shall lope to peace my dear

I who has been running for so long

I shall board those airplanes, ride those trains, drive that car

Not to run away from anything

But to move to a good place

And I will meet you there

Scenario II.

You blew into town like a storm

You were in grad school and I was in grade school


I loved you before I was old enough to know what love was

For years I followed you

And you never noticed me.

My calls and emails went unnoticed.

And then one night in November

You saw me, finally

And you saw me as a man

And you liked what you saw

Wanted me

I have wanted you for so long

I know no other way

And yet

Our age difference is great

What the heart wants the eyes cannot bear

What the heart wants the mind cannot conceive

Scenario III.

I made excuses

Reigned myself in tight

So as not to step on anyone’s toes

I made myself small

And then I met you

And understood that the size of my insides were much larger than the circumference of my skin

You showed me how to liberate myself from the boundaries I put on myself

When I met you

That deep inner voice said

“This is the one”

I wanted to die in your arms

In December you got the call

Your next mission

Fulfillment of years of training

You were going to war

And now I go out

And ride camels

And walk with hawks

I ride horses across

And jump out of airplanes

I hike the big mountains by myself

Race cars across the desert

Kayak the jungle rivers

By myself

You will not return to me

But the part of me you changed lives on

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